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Site Home » Self Help » Encouragement & Motivation
 

It's a Habit

 
Author: Judy Ringer

Do you sometimes have the feeling that you're running into the same obstacles over and over again? Many of my conflicts have the same feel to them, like "Hey, I think I've been here before," but I can't figure out how I wound up in the same place. The situation is different, but the conflict feels the same.

I first read this poem in "The Tibetan Book of Living and Dying" by Sogyal Rinpoche. When I "Googled" it, I found fourteen pages of links. It's clearly a favorite with many people; I know it speaks volumes to me.

"Autobiography in Five Chapters"
1) I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk
I fall in.
I am lost . . . I am hopeless.
It isn't my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.

2) I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don't see it.
I fall in again.
I can't believe I'm in the same place.
But it isn't my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

3) I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it is there.
I still fall in . . . it's a habit
My eyes are open
I know where I am
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

4) I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk
I walk around it

5) I walk down another street.

Does this feel familiar? I am ready to learn that lesson! I'm sure that I've changed. I can see that hole coming a mile away. This time it will be different. I still end up falling in. Tired, sad and angry, I drag myself up once again. What was I supposed to learn here? I thought I learned that the last time.

Some conflicts seem to take years to unravel, but if we stay tuned, and our purpose is to look with curiosity and awareness, we will find the moment when we can step around the hole.

As I write, thinking about a recent stumble of my own, I am smiling a bit. From a distance, I watch myself drop into the hole - one I know well - and it's kind of funny. And perhaps that is the way out - to laugh more often, to "love our mistakes," as my friend says. I've heard it said that eventually we will laugh at all our mistakes - the trick is to laugh sooner. When I can laugh as I climb out of the hole, I'm on my way to finding the route around it, or better yet, that alternate street.

Author Bio:

Judy Ringer

Judy Ringer is Founder of Power & Presence Training, a Portsmouth, NH company specializing in unique workshops to help organizations manage conflict, communicate effectively, and co-create a positive work environment.

The author of Unlikely Teachers: Finding the Hidden Gifts in Daily Conflict, Ringer provides training throughout the U.S. and Canada with unique workshops based on mind/body principles from the martial art aikido, in which she holds a black belt. In addition, she uses her expertise in several best practice communication models to bring to life key concepts such as self-management under pressure and appreciation of other viewpoints. Her programs are interactive, experiential and energetic.

Clients include Maine Medical Center, The National Institutes of Health, BAE Systems, Sony Corporation, Honda of America Manufacturing, Bose Corporation, Maine General Health, The American Red Cross, The National Education Association, and the States of New Hampshire and Vermont.

She has written numerous articles on the relevance and application of the aikido metaphor to conflict and communication, including articles for Aikido Today Magazine and The Systems Thinker. She is the author of two newsletters, including the award-winning Ki Moments, and the book, Unlikely Teachers: Finding the Hidden Gifts in Daily Conflict.

Ringer is also chief instructor of Portsmouth Aikido, Portsmouth, NH. She can be reached at judy@judyringer.com.

You can search for this article using: motivation, employee motivation program, employee motivation, self motivation, motivation theory
 
 
 

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