"When I was your age....." If you don't believe this one is useless, just watch your teen's eyes the next time you say this one. You will see them glaze over as they go into the "I've got to sit through this again" trance. They hear absolutely nothing you say after "when I was your age." Step back a moment and consider what you are trying to teach them. In doing family therapy, I will often ask a parent, in front of the teen, "what were you like when you were 16?" The teen is usually listening intently and gets to see a side of the parent they may have never seen before. ParentTip One - An alternative is to work this information into everyday conversation, without the dreaded "when I was your age." ParentTip Two - If you must talk about how things were when you were their age, at least make it humorous or shocking. For example, how we actually had to get up to change the TV channel and cartoons were on only on Saturday mornings. Here's what can often happen after reading an article like this one. As a parent, you'll catch your self saying "when I was your age" again. That's natural. Sometimes it takes conscious attention to change. Simply stop your self, remember what your are trying to teach, and use one of the suggested alternatives. |
