When you're new to swinging, you might feel a bit uncomfortable, like you don't know the rules, what's appropriate and what's not.

Maybe you're just nervous.

And that's okay because nerves can be a powerful aphrodisiac as well.

Now let's talk about soft and hard options (wink).

Soft Swinging

This is the stage where most swingers start out. Whether you're alone or in a couple, with one person or another couple, you can break into swinging gently.

You're going to find a room that everyone is comfortable in, set the mood with candles and music, if you'd like. Feel sexy, feel adventurous.

And there are two ways the night (or day) can proceed. Kissing, touching, and exploring are all on the menu, but intercourse is not.

Not yet, anyways.

You might even want to stick with the person that you came with and not touch your new friends. Or maybe you just want to watch the other couple let passion overtake them. It's amazing how sexy you can feel by watching someone else start the action.

And if the mood hits you, you can go over to another partner and continue with the touching and exploring. Sex is not an option, so you can get mighty creative with your imagination. And whatever end up happening, you're all in the same room. No one leaves for another locale.

All of the heavy breathing and heat stays put.

For now.

There's much more satisfaction to come.

Easy now.

Hard Swinging

But what if you're ready to take it up a notch (or down, for that matter)?

That's where hard swinging comes into play. And by play, the rules have changed and the rules are now working to every advantage that you can think of.

Pick a few rooms, an entire house, a pool, whatever and let your inhibitions run wild. Intercourse is fair game.

Don't limit yourself with a bed or a hotel room, get creative. Clear out your house and see where you can hide (and find) yourself.

You can go off with someone that you're enjoying or stay and watch what your partner is doing. You might just get some fantastic ideas or want to imitate.

Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.

Take your new partner into another room and succumb to your passions and your lust. Imagine your partner in the other room with another person.

Hot, hot, hot.

You want to talk with the other couple outside of the bedroom(s) to see what you'll be experiencing for the evening. Setting clear boundaries ahead of time can save any miscommunication or mixed signals.

Do you want to have sex with another person or not?

Do you want to be in the same room as your partner?

The choice is up to you because this is your fantasy and you want to make it come to life.

You can start with soft swinging until you want to move on, or jump in for the whole enchilada (amongst other things) with hard swinging.

And whatever happens, happens..